and now I wait...

So I just had my last IUI ever and as I was lying there while it happened, a new mas.ter.card commercial idea popped into my head - goes like this:

Fertility medication $1500.00
Sperm wash $250.00
Having your doctor insert his fingers into your vagina to feel around for your cervix cause hes been trying for like 10 minutes with no success.... priceless.

Ya, seriously it happened.

last IUI ever!

haven't blogged in a while-took a month off of trying and now i am doing my last IUI ever (as long as its a good cycle). kinda scary. not really expecting this one to work, but i hope it will. after this its IVF. i am running out of options and time and sanity...well that probably ran out after my miscarriage.
i am still reading all your blogs and wish you all the best, but i'm not really in the mood for much commenting.

not pregnant, again

so my life still sucks and i am so tired of all this. i am tired of hoping for something that probably won't happen. i am tired of waiting and trying and meds and needles and crying.
i think we need to take a break so i can figure things out.

this is how i am going to stay busy during the 2ww...

i'm officially in the wait now. oh man, this is going to be a long one because it was a good cycle, and there's more than one follicle - i think of twins, and then of no babies. so in an effort to keep myself busy, i am going to torture my husband!!! check out this article:
Can Crotch Length Predict Sperm Strength
http://www.businessweek.com/lifestyle/content/healthday/650568.html
I am going to tell him that I signed him up for a study the clinic is doing and he has to go in to get himself measured!!! oh he is going to HATE me! (i swear we have a good relationship, and i am not mad at him)

im surging!

so my IUI is tomorrow. i have 2 mature follicles (17 & 18), and 2 close to mature (14 & 15)... i wonder if the 14 and 15 will mature????
this is going to be a long 2 weeks!!!

waiting for follicles to mature

i know its still early (CD 13), but after not ovulating last month, and having other cycles where i have my IUI's day 14/15, this one is slow. i have 3 follicles this time (so far) 10,11, and 13mm... hoping they will all mature.
i can't even convince myself that this will work out - not that i tell myself it won't, but i just cant be optimistic - i just can't even go there anymore.
it scares me to know that the end is nearing. we're going to try IVF soon, and if that doesn't work I don't know what we will do. we have thought of donor eggs, but we will have to see what happens with the IVF first.

bravelle injection story

so i was giving myself a lovely injection of bra.velle this morning, and you know how you pinch your stomach to stick the needle in - well for some reason after i stick the needle in i always forget to stop pinching my stomach so when my injection was done i pulled the needle out (probably too fast) and was still pinching my stomach and some of the liquid started squirting out at me... i don't know if i was more grossed out about seeing this, or upset about leaking my expensive bra.velle onto my bed. i was like NOOOOOOOOO how is my follicles supposed to get bigger now!!!! AKKK! perhaps i should get extra vials for next time?
needless to say, i don't think i will do that again!